Crime and Punishment

I know we haven't been very good bloggers lately, but I've decided to try a new approach. The following link will take you to a news article about a woman who is imprisoned for providing alcohol at her son's birthday party. What I want to know is do you think her sentence is justified? If you want to get into whether or not the law is just, I'm cool with that as well. Just what do you think?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/6747807.stm

Back to the Grindstone...

So school is starting way soon and I'm actually somewhat excited. Lame? Maybe, but I'm really looking forward to my classes next semester. :D
So, here's the question: What about you guys?
What are you taking next semester and are you looking forward to those classes?
Where are you living and with whom?
Anything else horribly exciting happening?
Let us know what's going on in your life.

Family Matters

So there's something I've been struggling with a lot lately. I'm pretty sure you all know about my whole fun family, especially the man formerly known as my uncle. Okay, that was a little confusing. Just in case you don't remember or were never clear on the details, allow me a brief review.
1. My uncle (Steve) cheated on my aunt multiple times. She forgave him, but ultimately he divorced her and moved up to Washington state, where...
2. He met this divorced woman with two kids of her own who he brought to meet us in Abilene and...
3. Randomly married her in Vegas on their way home without telling any of us.
4. My family apparently doesn't deal with anything. We go with the idea that as long as you pretend everything is all right, nothing can possibly be wrong.
5. My dad's side of the family has the thrilling Aunt Bonnie, who is controlling and mean. Everything she does is right and anyone who disagrees with her is wrong. Oh, and health and wealth gospel big time.
6. Aunt Bonnie and Uncle Scott are in the processs of adopting a baby which is bad because they're over 50, have a VERY skewed vision of Christianity, and are in general very disagreeable people who feel that everyone should venerate them.
Anyway, my immediate family is really small and so we spend a lot of time together. A lot. And while I love being with my mom's parents, who all of you know are amazing people, I'm sick of hearing how great of a mom Bonnie is (in her own view point), how wonderful Steve's new kids are and how much fun it is to have new grandchildren, how cute baby Jonathan is, and how perfect our family is. Now, I try to just politely listen so as not to upset anybody because I don't want to hurt any of my grandparents' feelings. They are, after all, old (especially mom's parents, who are both around 80). But I'm also going nuts trying to be polite to people who are so screwed up. I'm tired of listening to people gloating about how amazing they are when they're actually doing stuff that's wrong or stupid.
So here's my question: How obligated am I to protect people's feelings? How much craziness do I put up with before I say that I have reached the bounds of fillial piety? When can I say what's on my mind? (And don't worry, I'll censor my thoughts when I finally share them.) What's a nice way of saying that I want nothing to do with the man who willfully tore apart my family or to the woman who assumes that she's so much better of a mom than mine just because here husband has been raising a little boy that she only sees 3 hours a day for the past 6 months? (BTW, Scott had a nice little rant the other night about how Bonnie knows nothing about parenting and how sick he is of her telling him what to do since he's the one that actually takes care of the kid all day every day.) Do I just keep my thoughts to myself? or is it appropriate to say some of what's on my mind?
HELP!!!
Oh, and I miss you all. This would be so much easier to discuss if you guys were all here in the same room with me.

I don't suppose anyone remembers this blog...

Hello, friends! I'm currently recovering from sickness in Mexico. I have a few thoughts I would like to share with you.
1. I think we all need to stop using passive voice in discussing rape, abuse, or molestation.
I realize this is a semantic difference, but I think it is an important one:
"She was raped" becomes "Someone raped her"
"They were abused" becomes "Their mother abused them"
"He was molested" becomes "He molested him"
I think victims too often are assigned blame, and I think one small way of fighting this would be to consciously refuse to ever say "She was raped" again--place the culprit as the subject of the sentence, not the victim.
2. When we're afraid of our culture sending out negative messages, we need to make sure that we counter that with positive messages instead of a vacuum.
The instance in which I was thinking about this was the subject of gender identity. As enlightened, feminist egalitarians, my parents didn't emphasize "You do this because you're a girl" very much. Although this is much much much better than enforcing a sexist system of gender identification, this vacuum made me more vulnerable to other voices. I think a better way of dealing with that would be to say, "You're strong because you're a woman," and "You can show emotion and be compassionate because you're a man"--essentially giving children a rich and full definition of identity instead of a vacuum. (I'm pretty sure my parents tried to do that, it was just an example...)
I think this same principle is applicable to a lot of other subjects as well.

Okay, I'm all tired out. Please comment, people. It would make me feel so sad if no one commented!

Heaven and Hell

Do you believe in Heaven and Hell?

Is heaven paved with gold or like earth, without tears? Or is it both? I haven't ever thought much about heaven and hell other than I hope to get to heaven someday. But I'd like to know what other people expect, think, fear. So if you could take a few minutes to tell me what you believe, it doesn't have to be deep. It doesn't have to have a bibliography. I don't care how zany it seems; I just want to know if people believe and what those beliefs are.

A King & a Kingdom

Who's your brother? Who's your sister? You just walked passed him. I think you missed her. As we're all migrating to the place where our father lives, 'cause we married in to a family of immigrants
My first allegiance is not to a flag, a country, or a man. My first allegiance is not to democracy or blood. It's to a king & a kingdom.
There are two great lies that I've heard: the day you eat of the fruit of that tree, you will not surely die and that Jesus Christ was a white, middle-class republican and if you wanna be saved you have to learn to be like Him.
My first allegiance is not to a flag, a country, or a man. My first allegiance is not to democracy or blood. It's to a king & a kingdom.
But nothing unifies like a common enemyand we've got one, sure as hell but he may be living in your house. He may be raising up your kids. He may be sleeping with your wife. Oh no, he may not look like you think.

- Derek Webb

Any thoughts? Comments? Don't kill the blog!!!!

Where is the Line Again?

So I found this song on iTunes recently and I like it a lot, for obvious reasons and just cuz I like the Dresden Dolls.

bad habit

biting keeps your words at bay

tending to the sores that stay

happiness is just a gash away

when i open a familiar scar

pain goes shooting like a star

comfort hasn't failed to follow so far...

and you might say it's self-indulgent

you might say its self-destructive

but, you see, it's more productive

than if i were to be healthy

& pens and penknives take the blame

crane my neck & scratch my name

but the ugly marks

are worth the momentary gain...

when i jab a sharpened object in

choirs of angels seem to sing

hymns of hate in memorandum

and you might say it's self-indulgent

and you might say it's self-destructive

but, you see, it's more productive

than if i were to be happy

and sappy songs about sex and cheating

bland accounts of two lovers meeting

make me want to give mankind a beating

and you might say it's self-destructive

but, you see, i'd kick the bucket

sixty times before i'd kick the habit

and as the skin rips off i cherish the revolting thought

that even if i quit

there's not a chance in hell i'd stop

and anyone can see the signs

mittens in the summertime

thank you for your pity, you are too kind

and you might say its self-inflicted but you see that's contradictive

why on earth would anyone practice self destruction?

and pain opinions are sitcom feeding

they dont know that their minds are teething

makes me want to give mankind a beating

i'm tried bandages and sinking

i've tried gloves and even thinking

i've tried vaseline

i've tried everything

and no-one cares if your back is bleeding

they're concerned with their hair receding

looking back it was all maltreating

every thought that occurred misleading
makes me want to give myself a beating....

My question is, should I listen to songs like this? Should I read books like Sharp Objects (very good, btw)? Or should I avoid any mention of something that is very tempting? Should we expose ourselves to a certain level of temptation in order to build up an immunity, or is that just asking how close we can get to the line before God gets mad?

Thought from a land far, far away (England)

So Janine Morgan, on of our professors here, has been introducing an idea that has really stuck with me. The existential void. That space that is empty in life. The time between class and finding someone to eat with. The blank pause which hovers in the air between the end of work and going to sleep. The moments you feel alone. Don't you feel it? What are we doing then? Are we filling it with filling-less things? Have you ever thought of facebook and email, t.v. and food as not just wastes of time, but ways of avoiding the feeling of emptiness in this 'void'? That the feeling of desperation to find someone to be with, something to do, is trying to fill up the space? Does anyone else feel this? Maybe this is nothing new to anyone else reading this, but I'd never really been aware of it quite so specifically. Everytime I am in-between activities, I am now aware of the void; it has been named. Janine was prompting us to fill the void with what truely fills. What would happen if everytime we bump into the void we met with God? Hmm...

Is Honesty Always the Best Policy?

Okay, so this isn't based on anything in particular. Seriously. I tend to evade questions that I don't want to answer. I don't tend to lie. But that's totally irrelevant.
The point is, is there a good time to lie? I mean, if your life's in danger, that would seem like a good time to lie. But is it?
Is it okay to lie when telling the truth is going to hurt someone's feelings?
Is there such a thing as a "white lie," or is it al the same?
If it is okay to tell a lie, what are the conditions?
Not terribly practical for any immediate problem, but it is an important question. Or rather, series of questions. And, mainly, I don't want Laura to hurt me. :)

bob's your uncle (and mine, too!)

I just wanted to let you all know that Melanie and I are coming up with a new code. We decided that sometimes, being girls, we get in moods where we don't really want to talk to anyone. We'd rather they just know what we're thinking or know what we're saying while we are using the smallest number of words possible. And so... drum roll, please... a new code is emerging from the Isle of Great Britain! Bob's Your Uncle Code!!! This, of course, is working title. For those of you who are unaware, in Great Britain 'Bob's your uncle' is an interjection used to describe, sort of, how easy something is. For instance, that snazzy guy on the infomercial might say, "And now when you order this pair of steak knives we'll give you this hob and grill blooming free! A £35 value, absolutely blooming free! That's right... Bob's your uncle!"

Now some of you are aware of a previous key. This "Boyspeak Key," if you will, has followed me to England and is now posted on our lovely bulletin board. This, along with our slight frustrations with one another, has inspired The Bob's Your Uncle Code. Bob's Your Uncle, though, uses a combination of letters and numbers for initial remarks and a word and number as a response. I just thought you all should know. I'll leave you with a few examples. Enjoy.

Initial Remarks:
A5 What you're doing is slightly annoying just now... Shh!
B5 Do you want to get out of bed and turn off the alarm?
C5 I'm scratching my butt at you. : ) : )
[This one is for all of you in the pod. If you're not in the pod, don't think less of us(And we are, just so you know...)!]
D5 I hate how my belly fat hangs over my pants.
E5 It's cold; plug in the heater. (Useful in our drafty top floor room)
F5 What you're doing right now makes me feel a little sad.
G5 I feel like you don't like me.
H5 What you're doing makes me smile (precursor to C5... see above).
I5 Can I use this book?
J5 Do you need that light on? (This means... Turn It Off!)
K5 How long have your dishes been there? Eww.
L5 Laura is amazing.
M5 Melanie is amazing.

We thought the last two worked out really well, so we stopped there for now...

Response:
Bob1 Yes
Bob2 Heck Yes
Bob3 No
Bob4 Prolly not
Bob5 Terribly sorry, old chap
Bob6 True that!
Bob7 Drats.
Bob8 Huzzah
Bob9 Hot dog!
Bob10 Good grief.

I know this is all very deep, and you may feel too intimidated to comment. Please, this is to be (as Mimi Bernard likes to say) a Low Threat zone. Hopefully this will stimulate High Risk comments and questions. This is a great set up for learning! : ) Let us know what you think or if you have suggestions. I'm kind of thinking of threatening people on Facebook... WATCH OUT! : )

in the footsteps of... a prominent british writer and theologian

It's official. Melanie and I have now launched into an amazing world of patrons. Patrons of a pub I've wanted to visit for as long as a I can recall (at least since I knew what a pub was). Our first supper in Oxford was just consumed in the very same establishment where the Inklings gathered not so long ago. I was thinking about C.S. Lewis being in the very same room I was standing in, and I realized it really wasn't that long ago that he and his colleagues were here. Strange.

We've also done some other fun things. A walk around University Parks. A stop on the Rainbow Bridge. On to the City Centre. Grocery shopping. I got some really great pineapple juice, by the way.

Also a highlight... Melanie already tried to burn down our room. We were sitting in our room trying to get our Internet connections up and running. Something started to smell like burning plastic! We thought. We thought. Thought some more. "Melanie," I said, "Is that your computer?" Indeed it was. She'll have to elaborate if she so chooses. It was pretty entertaining. We had to open the window for a bit.

Just wanted to give you an update. Someone should post something real on the blog so we can discuss! : ) Peace, friends.

I Hate to Hog the Spotlight....

Okay guys, does everyone know what time it is?
Come on. We need to pick a new book for this semester. Comments? Suggestions? I've been looking and haven't fallen in love with anything yet. But we've got like 2 weeks until school starts and we need to have something picked by then. Let's start talking about this kids...