So I hate to cut the discussion of Barret short... (I know Doug will be especially crushed)
As everyone at ACU knows, Soul Force is coming to campus on Monday. And we have been engaging in some discussions concerning the upcoming event. All this discussion has me thinking about the balance between not judging and keeping one's standards. Obviously, this is a tough line to draw, and no one is going to have the perfect answer, but I think it's a topic worth discussion. How and when is it appropriate to confront people? When should we just keep our mouths shut? All of this is really important to think about, since most of us won't be spending the rest of our lives in the buckle of the Bible Belt.
In my opinion, I think confrontations should be done very carefully, and only in certain circumstances. I feel like confronting someone with whom you have a very intimate relationship (not in a sexual way) is very appropriate, but otherwise I think it's best to avoid passing judgement. Coming across as too harsh is, in my opinion, one of the best ways to drive people away from Christ.
On the other hand, I'm not going to ignore my values or go against them just because I'm with people who don't feel the same way about things. Just because everyone around me isn't acting the way I think they should doesn' t mean that I can't. If people ask why I don't do certain things (or do certain things), I'm more than happy to tell them. But that's a door that they need to open for themselves. Of course, if I'm close to somebody I will be more likely to express my opinion and tell them what they should do, but if you're just acquaintances I hardly think that's appropriate.
Anywho, comment. I want to know what you guys think, whether or not you agree with me. I obviously don't have all the answers, but now at least I'm asking the right questions.
2 comments:
I agree that confrontations should be handled carefully. Now I'm going to say something, and I don't mean that I'm going to go up to some person I only see for an hour or two every other day in one of my classes and tell them they should stop getting drunk on the weekends. That doesn't make sense, and it would accomplish nothing. I do think, though, that as much as we need to be careful not to do that, we should also be careful not to sit back too often. I'm not sure it should always take someone directly asking us what 'makes us different' for us to want to love that person enough to tell them something they're doing may be wrong. Once again, I'm not saying we should go around as self-righteous snobs coming down on, and belittling people we see for everything that they have wrong in their life. If that's what should be happening then we would all be getting hit over the head with so much guilt that we'd never get anything accomplished. So I guess I'm saying that I heartily agree with the use of the word 'balance' for this situation.
Personally, I try not to wait for an outright question from most people. I mean, I'm gonna wait for a lead in from them, but not an outright question. Does that make any sense to anyone else? Part of me wants to be like Jeremiah. I know he was speaking to people who were supposed to be God's people. They weren't acting like it, though. Isn't that what we have around us in America a lot? I sat through a class just yesterday about Christianity increasingly being pushed to the margins. Churches are no longer growing primarily from converts. The percentage of churches growing primarily by conversion in the United States is 1% according to Randy Harris. When it's obvious that our entire country is not make up of Christians, isn't there something terribly terribly wrong with that?! We have, cliché as it is, a saving message. Shouldn't we feel compelled? I'll save my Jeremiah rant for another post...
So anyway... there again every person's different. And I'm not saying standing on a corner and yelling your message with tears streaming down your face is going to work for everyone. Some people can handle confrontation and some can't. So that's where the relationship you were talking about comes in, I think. I think the balance has to be seen, like everything else, through the eyes of our loving God. It's just pretty much pointless without love even if the timing is right.
Soul Force seems like a very unique opportunity to me. We have people coming here that are going to share their views and help us understand where they're coming from while they're listening to our side. Of course, that would be the ideal in this situation. Things happen. Some people are a little dumb and a lot hurtful. Prayer is in order for the whole thing, in my humble opinion... : )
I didn't reread this to see if it makes sense. Apologies.
This may deviate a little from the question asked, but I'm responding to the whole Soul Force thing. I'm personally very grateful to be at a school who's administration and faculty are willing to risk discomfort to be open minded and loving as the body of Christ. Often times I find myself running from anything that appears to be condemning or conservative in a way that strangles life. Sometimes I think this leads me to wrong judgements and a lack of my opinions, rather I end of just arguing AGAINST something. Also, as far as confrontation goes, I find it easy to just kind of nod and smile when friends or others I am talking to discuss things they do that I don't agree with. I think this is because I don't want to be seen as a ultra-goody goody or someone who judges and disapproves of everything. This is a purely selfish motivation, I know. I think there can be power in 'confronting' others, but like someone else already said, probably only those you are already close to and might respect your opinion. I'm hoping that the SoulForce group will have felt love and a welcoming community today. I've been feeling irked everytime someone mentioned 'them' or if 'they' are here. It's just people! No, I'm not comfortable or better, and I must admit that some of the forum tonight was a little annoying, but it has been good to discuss the issue, and be challenged in our comfort zone to meet people different from us, who many have real faith...some of the group was sitting next casey and I at chapel today and were engaged in heartfelt worship. It was interesting. Anyway, this a random brain dump, and I must get to studying, but there are some of my thoughts for what they're worth.
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